Problems

DANG!!! This few days i haven't been myself. keep having those moods where i'll just have my private moments. and at times, i feel mad at certain people which were for unreasonable things. yeah, that's how bad it was for me. i, myself wasn't sure what causes this mood. it just comes and go.

Today, i have a bad day and worse ending it with a harsh text message to my sis. she really pisses me off. i don't mind waiting for her after school but if she actually want to go somewhere, tell me earlier and not when i've already reached. LET ME TELL YOU THIS, YOU ALWAYS DON'T WANT YOUR FRIENDS TO WAIT FOR YOU BUT YOU ALWAYS MAKE ME WAIT FOR YOU. AND AT THE END OF DAY we'll have 2 sour faces walking on the street. but what i'm most angry these 2 days since i last saw you yesterday night was your BLOODY MOOD SWING!!! you always and never fail to piss me with your mood swing. throughout the years i've always been tolerating this and guess what, you've pushed me to the limit.

While waiting for her:

• I text message Fiza complaining about my sis when i realise i text it to my sis.
• She replied with a harsh tone which i deserved.
• I replied saying i was bored and finding fault but then i its best to tell her the truth.
• I told her i'm piss off by her and blah blah blah blah blah.

Another reason i've kept to myself is that you've always been cursing me about my friendship with my friend whom i consider my bestfriends. and are you happy now that due to school work and other stuff happenings around me, i don't even have time to contact them? or don't tell me you wished for the worst?

A few people have been pushing me to the limits and let me tell you this: DON'T EVER EVER ACTIVATE MY "HATRED" FEELING TO YOU! I WILL NOT CARE ABOUT YOU IF IT HAPPENS!!! just like someone close to me. if you know who i meant. one thing i'm sure of, the feeling will always fade once you've change.

But to tell you the truth the people around me are pleasant with their own personalities which made me hard to hate you guys.

No matter what, i still love my sis but these moments will always come and go if she follow her emotions tooo much!!!

At times, it's good to suppress your feelings but at times its best to let it go! look at the situation first before you do that. it might be too much for people around you. use your brain to think and don't be tooo clingy. i never ever want to blame you for how close i am to mama, which wasn't as close as yours. sometimes it's good to let me care for mama more than you think and see how far you can spread your wings outside.

and now i'm beginning to think that my "independent" is a bad thing to me when it comes to my family. i'm not very close to anyone in particular. and it hurts when you see someone like your own sis can relate well to your mum and not you. maybe because at times we had our own ways of thoughts.

All I had to say, is to have "you" to stop thinking "you're" great and whatever. don't wish to say much about it. just to tell you that anyone including me might lose our patience and burst which might cause huge problems and i don't wish that to happen.

guess, i'll stop here for now.
remember: smile alwaez :)

at times i know i did piss some of you and i'm sorry. i know how well your expressions are.